Fat = Lorna Jane = FAIL!

Now with the biggest loser taking up my T.V at night, you probably think i should just change the channel... but it makes no difference cause my T.V is widescreen at those fat people just spread across every channel i have... and its hurts my eyes so i in turn decide to exercise... only to be let down again by the outside world.... now this issue was once brought to my attention by a fitness friend who is so fit greek gods get there off season training done by him.... anywho... i would like to bring to all your attention that simply wearing a certain athletic brand while not help you lose weight / tighten your buns / make you sweat.... my current gripe is with Lorna Jane... i dont know who she is but if i ever meet her i bet she looks like a block of chocolate! Her brand which is swoonfully loved by all manner of females with ideals of being fit only to fall short and get tired after tieing up their shoe laces make me feel like her brand is some shonky pyramid scheme who is praying on mothers like the ab-swing does on day time t.v.... in recent days i have seen these slogans emblazened across the breasts of failures whose dreams of washboard abs are firmly placed still in the laundry... women who are pridefully wearing the "I LOVE RUNNING" Lorna Jane singlet, only to be walking... or the "SWEAT IS THE NEW BLACK" only to be sitting and looking at the path.... then there is the Lorna Jane sports bra worn with a tight white tops, just so you can see that the boobs mean business... which is saying.. while my breasts stay firm... im happy for everything else to go soft... I wish Lorna Jane would trade in her mantra of encouragment, like t-shirts that say "BELIEVE" 3 times on them... and get somewhat more forceful.. like the trainers on the biggest loser... i want a t-shirt that comes with someone stitched to it so when you wear it you are piggy backing someone who is telling you to run faster, harder, stronger!!!! you know.. some real motovation... instead of the newest and most fashionable colour palette being worn just to match your running shoes and the 13 sweat bands you wear but dont need cause both you and i know the only sweating that will be occuring is going to cause some thigh chaffing... so moral of this tale is... Slogans will not make you fit and all money buys is a tummy tuck... so make your choice... either do some real exercise or save your Lorna Jane spending sprees up and fly overseas for a tummy upgrade...